MIke Tyson Can’t Remember Fight, Fans Can’t Forget The Cringe

Mike Tyson’s return to the ring after nearly 20 years was hyped as a legendary showdown. Instead, it turned into Jake Paul’s personal sparring session, with Tyson admitting he can’t even remember most of the eight-round spectacle.

“I don’t remember the fight that much, I kind of blanked out,” Tyson said to Fox Sports Radio. “I haven’t watched the fight. You know what I remember? Coming back from the first round and Jake was doing some sort of bow… that’s the last thing I remember.” So, Tyson’s takeaway wasn’t Jake’s punches, but his interpretive dance routine. Iconic.

Jake Paul, ever the magnanimous sportsman, later confessed he went easy on the 58-year-old legend. “Yeah, definitely. Definitely a bit,” Paul said. “I wanted to give the fans a show, but I didn’t want to hurt someone that didn’t need to be hurt.” Oh, the self-restraint of a YouTuber-turned-fighter, sparing Tyson the wrath of his TikTok-level combos.

Tyson, meanwhile, shrugged off the loss with the calm of a man who’s seen it all. “I wasn’t tired, I wasn’t sweaty. I went to the house with my wife and kids, went to the after-party, then went back.” Translation: Jake may have won on points, but Tyson’s real victory was the buffet table at the after-party.

The fight wasn’t Tyson’s only struggle. He revealed he nearly died from an ulcer flare-up before the bout. But hey, what’s a little life-threatening condition when there’s an eight-round circus to perform in?

“This is one of those situations when you lost but still won,” Tyson said. And he’s not wrong—because if Jake Paul has to brag about holding back against a 58-year-old, who’s really taking the L here?